Tuesday 16 February 2010

The Wolfman


The Wolfman is out now. In brief, it's a mildly enjoyable, mercifully short slice of low fat horror cheese. It has some completely stupid bits, a lot of cliches and some terrible acting, but what do you expect? It's 2010, probably the worst year for movies since 1998, which I can barely bring myself to think about (Best film: A Bug's Life).

Anyway, Anthony Hopkins is in it, and The Incredible Suit has three insignificant observations to make about him and his character:

INSIGNIFICANT OBSERVATION #1
He can't decide on whether to go with a Welsh or Irish accent throughout the film, so he alternates between them in each scene. It's very distracting.

INSIGNIFICANT OBSERVATION #2
His character is called Sir John Talbot, which, by a staggering coincidence, is the name of the secondary school I went to:
It's called a Technology College now, whatever that means. They must have bought a computer since I was there.

INSIGNIFICANT OBSERVATION #3
It wasn't Anthony Hopkins at all. It was Teddy from
That sound you can hear is the bottom of the 'tenuous lookalike' barrel being scraped very, very hard.

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12 comments :

  1. Yeahh, Dr K said it was crap, too.

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  2. I bet he didn't mention my old school or any tenuous lookalikes though, the amateur.

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  3. No, but he did say BdT looked like Teen Wolf. And, btw, he did point out that Percy Jackson was also crap. And a total waste of time. - Nerdy Kid finds out hes a wizard, finds out his dad was a wizrd, goes to a school to learn wizardage, directed by Chris Colombus...JKR get on the Litigifone!

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  4. BdT always looks like he needs a good scrub and shampoo to me.

    Ms So So Jeans

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  5. SSJ, shall I let him know you're available for grooming duties?

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  6. I'd much prefer groom Mr Craig, who never looks like he needs a good wash, unfortunately. I have some friends who would happily lick BdT clean, ew.....

    Ms So So Jeans

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  7. Hopkins looks more like this;
    http://snipurl.com/udzij

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  8. Damn, I must have been scraping the wrong barrel!

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  9. The Incredible SUIT in pursuit of the hirsute Hopkins is in danger of a Freudian slip. My Talbot school connection is that it had a car club and we had a 1953 Talbot Sunbeam for us to take apart. I remember the headlights dipped via a solenoid that grabbed the reflector & lamp.

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  10. As soon as I read the line 'probably the worst year for movies since 1998', I immediately thought 'hang on a minute, didn't The Big Lebowski, Saving Private Ryan and American History X come out that year'.
    Yes, they did, but after some quick research, I concluded you were right - 1998 sucked the big one ("And the best film Oscar goes to... Shakespeare In Love... really?"). No more needs to be said. Except for perhaps these words: Gus Van Sant's Psycho. Does it get any more pointless?

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  11. Holy shit in the shortbread Doc, you're absolutely right. For some reason I'd associated TBL with 1997 like the idiot hole I am.

    SPR and AHX didn't do it for me but I stand corrected. 1998's best film was indeed The Big Lebowski.

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  12. Greatest werewolf transformation ever, American Werewold in London, right? Oscar for Rick Baker.
    So with this remake of the most important werewolf film ever, they get Baker on board to design the make up. Great idea.
    But instead of using his Oscar winning method of practical make up effects that move or stretch, they use CGI. Which looks like CGI. And yet it still wins another Oscar.
    Go figure.

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