Thursday, 11 February 2010

A Fungus-Ravaged Toenail

Last week The Incredible Suit broke new ground in witty, incisive and pioneering blogging by criticising a film poster with two people on it whose names were the opposite way round to how they appeared in the shot.

While normal, sane people might not give a fungus-ravaged toenail about such matters, it drives me up the chuffing wall. So at the risk of further exacerbating my mentile issues, let me demonstrate just how prevalent this sloppy practice is:

I mean, obviously that's not Leonardo DiCaprio on the left and Kate Winslet on the right, but the layout of the poster makes it look like that's what you're trying to say, and you just end up looking silly. Do we know which of those characters in Adventureland are played by which actors? No, and you're not helping with your irritatingly-positioned words.

If you're responsible for this kind of crappery, I've only got one thing to say to you:


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  1. By that rationale the ultimate film poster would be;

    With regards to the Adventureland poster the order of the written billing will be the result of hotly negotiated contractual shennanigans between the cast members respective agents. The 'and' clause for Ryan Reynolds (which for my money always reeks of television billing) is considered to be a real cock waving achievement. So his name has to come last. That he appears at the far left of the photographic line-up will also probably have been negotiated hard. That this makes a mockery of the typographic/pictorial lay-out is of no concern to his management. Their only interest is securing their client all sorts of kudos in an invisible and pathetic pecking order.

  2. An enlightening and eloquent response Mr Oysters. You should write a blog or something! Film stars are tits aren't they?

  3. I don't really mind about the names, since I am sure it's down to agents and egos and all sorts. But this sort of stuff annoys me on posters :-

    That is just fake, not confusing. Also, since you have set the ranty tone, I don't to sit through credits (because I'm a female and not an anorak and if I want info I'll find it elsewhere) so I do hate the idea of missing interesting little bits at the end (is there a proper anorak name for them?). There is one arthouse cinema in Auld Reekie where if you don't get oout of your seat no-one else can get past, so you have a whole row of anoraks and you are stuck in your seat whether you want to or not, and that's just plain rude.

    Ms So So Jeans

  4. A long time ago in a galaxy - oops, sorry, force of habit - A while back I babbled on about 'bits at the end'. Nobody read the blog in those days so why not have a look now?

    You should sit through the credits though, if only to hear some nice music (unless it's Leona Lewis).

  5. Are we talking about the same bits at the end? Did Brad turn up at the end of the main body of the film, or after/during the credits in a clip 95% of the audience would have missed?

    Ms So So Jeans?


  6. He didn't turn up at all. But if he had it would have been just for the loyal 5% of proper movie fans. Losers!

  7. So you are telling me there is no fancy movie name for bits at the end? Really? When there are names for other daft things? How strange. I always thought there should be a place which would tell you in advance that there were BATE present. Would you tell us Mr Suit or would you leave it for the 5% to find out?

    Ms So So Jeans