30-Minute Freeze-Frame Challenge #1: The Shining
30-Minute Freeze-Frame Challenge #2: A Clockwork Orange
Got all that? Good.
Blade Runner through The Incredible Suit's version of the Voight-Kampff test and see if it's a replicant or not. Ridley Scott seems as good a subject as any to subject to the intense scrutiny of the 30MFFC; as a director obsessed with stunning futuristic visuals, he must surely have envisaged that one day some prattling berk would come along and apply some arbitrary nonsense rules to the works of art over which he sweated blood for vast swathes of his life.
Before we start, at the last count there were 825 different versions of Blade Runner out there. The version I'm using is 'The Final Cut', as pictured above. So no squabbling.
And so without further ado, let's get arty.
0:30:00 Here's Rick "Black And" Deckard having a good yawn in a lift. Moody, yes. Interesting, no. Tragically, one second later, he whips round and draws his gun in an award-winning pose perfectly framed to please The Incredible Suit's eye. The rules are a cruel mistress, Scotty!
1:00:00 In a fight with Leon, the replicant whose face was designed by the Cruel Joke Department of the Tyrell Corporation, Rick is thrown against the windscreen of a car. This is probably the least remarkable shot in the whole sequence. Not looking good, is it?
1:30:00 Here's a staircase. A moodily lit staircase, to be fair, but a staircase nevertheless.
At last. I was beginning to think I was wasting my time with this feature, and although I obviously am, at least Blade Runner demonstrates that even the artiest and fartiest films struggle to meet the strict criteria of The Incredible Suit's 30-Minute Freeze-Frame Challenge.
So Kubrick's crown remains untouched. Who else will step up to try and take it? Leave your suggestions in the comments below and we'll see if death or glory or a silly picture of a man in a dunce hat awaits your choice.
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