Thursday, 15 July 2010


There's a lot of (quite justified) interwebfussery at the moment about the big difference between the Predators trailer and the actual film, which can pretty much be described like this:

I'm reasonably sure this is a contravention of the Trade Descriptions Act 1968 which, according to Wikipedia, "prevents manufacturers, retailers or service industry providers from misleading consumers as to what they are spending their money on", although as we all know the Trade Descriptions Act was heavily amended as a result of the Consumer Protection From Unfair Trading Regulations 2008.

What's probably more appropriate in this instance might be the Sale Of Goods Act 1979, which states that "the goods sold must be of satisfactory quality, taking into account the price, description and any other relevant factors".

So when you could feasibly shell out £13 to watch Predators (described by Fox as "a bold new chapter in the Predator universe"), and what you get is a piffly puddle of piddle which takes the central premise of the original film but removes all the wit, originality, fun and what little motivation there was for the story to take place, surely I can expect to see director and surefire dirty anagram Nimr√≥d Antal, as well as producer and most overrated person in movies Robert Rodriguez in the small claims court on as soon a date as is convenient to all parties?

The Lesson I Never Learn:

Final thought: Running around the jungle evading slobbery-mandibled mentaliens can be disorientating. To avoid misplacing essential items such as TV remotes, simply glue them to your gun to prevent future disappointment and frustration.

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  1. Isabelle (Alice Braga) has a Blaser R93 LRS2 Sniper rifle with Elcan DigitalHunter scope.

    I don't think it can select The One Show in HD. Neat if it could fire someone else's gun when they least expected it.

    The full details of the weaponary may be seen at

  2. Get a grip and stop posting useless shit like this.

  3. Hey! Nobody speaks to Tony like that on my blog!

  4. You have to admit that Tony's gun knowledge is a bit scary!
    Yeah the movie was piffle but the make-up effects on the new Predators were pretty good.
    Crap characters though except Isabelle of course. Eve Sir Laurence Fishburne was a let down, doing his Col. Walter E. Kurtz impression. I wonder if he got some tips from Brando when he worked on the movie?? Hmmm
    Posted by Marge Gunderson (I am not anonymous!)

  5. My knowledge of guns is confined to a Lee Enfield .303 rifle at 50, 200, 500 and 1,000 yards, clay pigeon shooting with a muzzle loading flint lock and air guns. My thoughts about the gun lobby are more in line with Boris (Larry David) in Woody Allen's brilliant film 'Whatever Works', a film I urge everyone to see.

    My 'useless' posting was a response to the Incredible Suit's comment about a gun in the film which I hoped would come across like one of those train buffs who watch Oscar winning 'Bridge on The River Kwai'(1957) and complain that in the opening scene, the railway is 5'6" (1.676 m) broad gauge, as used in Ceylon (Sri Lanka), the filming location; but when we see tracks on the finished bridge, they're much narrower, about 2' (60 cm).

    I will defend to the death your absolute right to call my postings 'useless' but I can inform you that I sneakily enjoy writing them which makes them useful to me and therefore contradicts your opinion.

    By the way, did you notice that in 'Bridge on The River Kwai' all the Japanese soldiers were using Lee Enfield rifles. Ha Ha.

  6. Dude, clearly knows his shit. I wouldn't go messing whoever wrote the second comment

  7. You see some pathetic stuff on the internet but every now and then you just come across a site that invokes real pity. Gun nerds and sweaty red faced film geeks planning to 'sue' over.. well, not much at all. Don't bother with your flabby comebacks either, I won't be back.

  8. Goodbye indeed, what an idiot!

    Posted by Marge x