Global testosterone levels were reported to be dangerously depleted over the weekend when it was discovered that almost every last sweaty drop of the stuff had been crammed into the new trailer for The Expendables, Sylvester Stallone's latest attempt to convince the world that he's not some kind of sissy.
In case you couldn't quite make out what Stallone was saying in that trailer, here's a few snippets of his soon-to-be-classic dialogue:
"Nnnnmm. Rrrr. Rrrnnnmm."
You'll note the trailer advertises its stars using only their surnames, because that's the manliest way you can possibly do it. After all, Jet, Mickey, Dolph, Steve, Bruce, Randy, Jason, Arnold and Sylvester just sounds like some kind of gay porn cabaret.
And then, summoning the very last reserves of macho juice and piddling them into another two-and-a-half minute clipgasm, came these guys:
"This court is rendering guilty verdicts for this Alpha unit... OR A-TEAM"
"I'm BA... you gonna B unconscious"
"It's payback time"
Anyone else think this might work better as a silent film?
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