Monday, 4 January 2010

2010: Like 1910 But With More CGI

Well bugger me with a broomstick if it isn’t 2010 already. Who’d have thought 2009 would be so good they’d make a sequel? Not me, that’s for sure.

Anyway viewers, The Incredible Suit is back contrary to popular demand following a relatively painless Christmas, apart from all the broomstick buggery of course, but that’s a different website altogether.

So what’s been going on since we last had blogual intercourse back in mid-December? Well, nothing. I’ve singularly failed to see lots of films that I wanted to, like The Box, The Men Who Stare At Goats, The Informant!, Bunny And The Bull, Nine, Where The Wild Things Are and Avatar, although that last one looks like it’ll be on for the next eight billion years so I’ll get round to it one day I’m sure.
Incidentally if you didn’t see anything at all at the cinema last year, then it looked a bit like this:

So what is there to look forward to in the coming twelve months at The Incredible Suit? Probably twelve months of sheer nincompoopitude and poppycockery I expect, but then you’re used to that by now so it won’t come as any surprise. At some point I hope to babble on about some films, and if you’d care to join me at some disgusting north London fleapit to watch any of the following, you’d be most welcome. As long as you buy the popcorn and agree to remain absolutely silent from the moment the first trailer starts.

Click the titles to watch a bite-sized version of each film! (if I could find one)

Exam 8 January
Micmacs 8 January
The Road 8 January
Up In The Air 15 January
44 Inch Chest 22 January
Edge Of Darkness 29 January
The Lovely Bones 29 January
Ponyo 12 February
The Wolfman 12 February
Shutter Island 19 February
Alice In Wonderland 5 March
Clash Of The Titans 26 March
Robin Hood 14 May
Knight & Day 2 July
Shrek Forever After 9 July
Toy Story 3 23 July
The A-Team 30 July
Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part I 19 November

And some more that haven’t got release dates yet:
Hot Tub Time Machine
Inception (the only one I’m genuinely excited about)
Gentlemen Broncos
Iron Man 2
Green Hornet
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
The Expendables

And no doubt a lot more that I don’t know about yet. Hopefully I’ll still have time to write an award-winning blog in between all that; if not I’ll just keep writing this one, ahahaha.

In the meantime Happy New Year to you lot from The Incredible Suit, and if you only make one resolution, make it to force everyone you know to read this blog. By gunpoint if necessary.*

PS Thanks to Brendan for the ‘back contrary to popular demand’ joke. There’s a whole Friends-style team of gag writers working on this blog I tell you.

*The Incredible Suit in no way condones the use of guns to increase blog readership unless they fire out a little flag that says ‘Bang!’ on it.

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  1. Happy New Year Mr Suit,

    I'm planning on being the only person who never ever watches Avatar, how long do you think it will take? By about April?

    I went to see Nine over the holidays (6 out of 10?) and as a result I've found a new little pot of frothy fun. It started by checking out the name of one of the actor's details in Happy Go Lucky on IMBD, and unusually I checked out the forums to see what people had said about it. A strange woman (I'm hoping she was American) had started a thread about whether all young women were as promiscuous as Poppy (because she slept with the giant on the first date). As if a fictional character (who was suspiciously happy it has to be said) could possible act as a marker for 50% of the world's population. Anyway, it was an previously untapped source of freaks I'd never bothered with before.

    So, I checked out Nine on IMDB and the big question was - apart from the obvious ones about the name - why there were so few (none) ethic minorities in the film. We're talking 1960s Italy now, in the film and magazine industries, and some wrirdy women (definitely American) felt that Beyonce (for she is the only talented black woman apparently) should have been in the film to replace Kate Hudson and then instead of being a flop, hoards of people would go and see it. So, if you do get to see Nine, bear it it mind as you watch...

    Ms So So jeans

    PS You missed Nowhere Boy off your list, and it's pretty good. Bound to be a lot better than The Box.

  2. Ms SSJ, I managed to book tickets for Avatar at the IMAX no sooner than Feb 12th. I'm reasonably certain that will put me in the final chunk of humanity to see it so I reckon you'll have achieved your goal by mid-Feb.

    Indeed there are innumerate freaks on the interwebs, as I fear I may have proved. That's what makes it such a special place ;-)

  3. I'll join you at some disgusting north London fleapit to watch some of the following (well some of the above really). No promises about silence or popcorn though. Asking a bit too much there, me thinks!

  4. Groovy. I'm watching Nine tonight. See you there x