Wednesday, 27 June 2012

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Jack Reacher?

To: Christopher McQuarrie
From: Barry Bigcheese, Paramount Pictures

Hi Chris,
Just wanted to wish you all the best with the filming of Jack Reacher. Just one thing - we bagged Tom Cruise before we'd read a single word of the books (come on, have you seen how long they are? Fuck that), and it turns out that Reacher's meant to be 6 foot 5 and Cruise is only 5' 7". Awk-ward! Can you do something about that? Hope so, because if not Ratner's outside claiming he can do it for half what you're costing us.

Barry Bigcheese

To: Barry Bigcheese
From: Christopher McQuarrie

Hi Barry,
Thanks for your words of encouragement. Don't worry - I watched the extras on the Lord Of The Rings DVDs and I've got this covered. I'll simply place everything and everyone else in the film way in the distance. That way Tom will look twice as tall as everyone else! Job done.



  1. Top post!

    I read one of the Reacher novels earlier in the year - Tripwire - and all I was picturing was Ray Stevenson (or someone of his ilk) as the Reacher character. I cannot fathom who could actually picture Tom Cruise when reading this character. Madness!

  2. I'm sure the Cruiser will do a good job, and Lee Child endorsed Cruise for the role too - but I always imagined Richard Burgi as Jack Reacher. Google him.

    1. absolutely - Richard Burgi - from the first book in the series to the last

  3. Why the constant harping on about Tom's height? Danny DeVito seems have something to do with every film made and he would not exactly be able to stand shoulder to shoulder with the Harlem Globetrotters. As for his private life who cares? He will not be dropping in for tea so I have no worries about who he is with or why.